I have wanted a wool “carpet jacket” for a long time but could never bring myself to make the purchase. It felt silly to spend money on one when I could just keep scouring secondhand stores for a few more years and eventually stumble upon one. Then we went to Wyoming. I could have gotten a hoodie or a t-shirt like a normal tourist, but I figured there was nothing that said “Wyoming” more than a carpet jacket. We found exactly what I wanted, it was perfect… and it was expensive. I immediately changed my mind and tried to back out of the purchase.
Does anyone else struggle with this sometimes? My husband and I live well beneath our means, we are frugal with our spending almost all the time and he does a great job managing our savings. Yet, even when it’s an investment, large purchases are very hard for me. The logical side of my brain knows that splurging on good appliances, education, travel, or clothing is an investment; but the emotional part of me panics and immediately feels guilty.
“Just buy the damn jacket, woman. Hell, buy both color options if you can’t choose.” My loving husband could see my internal struggle. He persisted and I resisted and then, well…. I bought the damn jacket, and let me tell you – it was worth it 😉
Sometimes it’s less about money and more about self worth. Hear this: YOU ARE WORTH INVESTING IN. It is not selfish of you to want or to buy _ (fill in the blank) to keep you healthy, make you smarter, increase your confidence, etc.
People around you will benefit from having you confident, self-assured, reliable, dependable, grounded, calm, conscientious and above all – healthy, happy and content.
Some people spend their whole lives believing they can’t, don’t want to, or don’t deserve wealth, longevity, vitality, experience or extravagance.
You. Are. Worth. It.
Something shifted in me that weekend… and this jacket is forever a representation of that mindset shift. I choose to feel worthy, because I am. I choose to feel worthiness around money. I am redefining who I am and how life can work for me. Spending is just releasing money, with intention, in exchange for something I want, with gratitude, in a way that feels good.
If you are struggling with your worth around money, I highly suggest reading the book “Rich as F*ck” by Amanda Frances. Personally, I prefer audio books and I listen in 1.75x or 2.0x speed in the car! SIGN UP FOR AUDIBLE HERE – it is one of my most favorite and most used paid subscriptions as a mom!
Here are 6 steps to Improve Your Relationship with Money
- Remind yourself that money is just money. It has no power on its own, only the power you give it. It is simply a vehicle to meet our needs.
- Get confident about your current financial situation AND your plan of action for how you are increasing your income and net worth.
- Realize that your net worth is connected to your selfworth, but not in the way you think. Money is energy, so if you have negative feelings around it and about it and you believe you cannot be trusted with it, then it will not come to you.
- Get perspective. Go somewhere else: out of your town, out of your city, out of your house. Stand on a mountain side looking over the valley and think about the vast opportunities you have before you. Look up at the stars and realize that your problems are so small in comparison.
- Manifest a new reality for yourself by taking unapologetic action towards what you want. If you have to, fake it till you start actually believing and feeling this new reality is true.
- Stop dwelling on who you USED to be, good or bad. That person is gone, so love her for who she was in that season (forgive her if necessary) and let go. Instead take inventory of who you are right now and how you can improve from here.
xoxo Carmen